{Upstate NY Wedding Photographer } - The Nightmares Have Begun!

The bad dreams have started. I am sure they begin because I am so passionate about what I do that my thoughts, fears and ideas don't necessarily shut down just because I fall asleep.

I dream a lot and usually it’s nothing worth remembering. Half of the time my dreams don’t make sense, but wedding season is upon us and the nightmares have started! What do they consist of? I am so glad you asked, because I feel I need to talk about it.
For instance I dream that I arrive at bridal suite at noon which would be fine if I wasn’t supposed to be there at 10. Then there is that great moment when I go to capture THE shot and realize my camera battery has died and I have no back up.
I don’t have a flash and the camera won’t focus in the super dark caverns style church or maybe I get lost and I can’t find the church or…
- I have the wrong date.
- All the images turn out dark…or don’t show up at all.
- My camera just stops working.
- I show up in my what I slept in the night before.
- I forget shoes
- I completely miss the ceremony.
-I fall
-I fall into water (don't ask)
The odd thing is that my scariest dreams in real life is having someone chase me.(No I didn't like hide and seek as a child).  So far no one has legit chased me at a wedding. I wake up in terrifying panic only be washed over with sweet relief when reality clears the haze.  It’s crazy! So far NONE of that has even come close to true. Therefore it results in checking and double checking and triple checking EVERYTHING.
Now that I have expunged my inner turmoil, you may continue on with your life without further interruption.

Sweet dreams!

{Upstate NY Wedding Photographer } Singing In your Car Sounds Great..Until You Turn the Radio Off

Just like a DIY wedding sounds great...until you actually have to do it.
Let's face it.  We are all rockstars when we are singing in our own car.  Please, I'm all Christina Aguilera until Christina gets turned down...then I'm very Amber Johnsish and trust me we sound nothing alike.
As a wedding photographer, I LOVE wedding details.  I cherish seeing how much thought and time as gone into the wedding itself.  I also can't imagine how much time it must take to pull off a truly DIY kind of weddding.

Do you love the idea of A DIY (Do it yourself ) wedding, but everything you touch is Pinterest Gone Bad .Those Pinterest ideas that look so great on your board and then  scream catastrophe and ineptitude in real life.

Perhaps you barely have enough to time to find your own wedding dress much less wrap each fork and knife in burlap and tag it with sweet sentiments, but you just love the weddings that produce such rustic detail. Oh the quandary! 

One venue in upstate NY is making a DIY wedding feasible with out necessarily doing it yourself.  Sound contradictory? Not at all.  If you LOVE the look of a DIY but there is no way in the real life you have the time, patience or perhaps the dexterity in your fingers to pull of such a task, then Maple Shade Farm has the answer.  
Jay and Abby Wilson have made Maple Shade Farm into a wedding venue people adore from their rustic details, kind personalities and overall attention to everything and anything a couple needs! They did not stop there. They brought DIY to life with possibility by creating a branch business MSF Vintage.

MSF Vintage can handle any detail the bride just does not have time to do.

*hand written place settings, numbers, tags for favors.
*seating charts
*creative table settings such as wrapped silverware, favors from scratch or an idea that just needs extra hands to come together)
*menu cards
*chalkboards
*directional signs
*decorated center piece holders from old wine bottles to coffee cans.
*late night snacks...s'more kits anyone????
*Of course anything such as flowers, candy bars, dessert tables, Photo Booth props... They also rent vintage furnishings and accessories to make your wedding one-of-a kind on or off the farm!
You can find MSF on facebook here
You can certainly have a DIY wedding looking wedding without doing everything yourself.

Upstate NY Wedding Photographer: Post Wedding Blues and a Little Help from FRIENDS

"I'm actually really sad it's over," said one of my brides when I saw her a couple of weeks after her wedding. "it's kind of sad to think I'm done planning my wedding."

She wasn't alone, the more people I asked the more I realized it happens to a lot of brides.  You have spent a year or more planning your wedding day, it makes sense that there is a sense of loss when it all comes to an end.

So I asked a few couples what they did to combat the "post wedding day blues". (The last idea is my favorite).

1. Get out of town.

Even if it's not a big honeymoon. Go somewhere and rest and enjoy each other.  Talk about the day, relive it and laugh through all of the moments you remember.

2. Gifts. Indulge in unwrapping all those amazing wedding gifts or splurge on a fantastic date night with some of the money you probably received. 

3. Help someone else plan their wedding.  I have known two brides two have actually turned their penchant for wedding planning into a business. 

4. Fill your time with something else.  You have spent so much time planning your wedding it's time to indulge in a new activity.   Volunteer for special needs, start blogging, take up some sort of new hobby.  

5.  Get help. If it's serious depression where you realize you aren't eating well and can't seem to truly function, it may be something you need to seek extra help for in a friend, another bride who has dealt with the same feelings or professional help.  There are actual groups out there for this very thing believe it or not. 

6. Relive the moments in photographs, videos and candids from your professionals as well as your friends oh and start writing thank you cards...that will take also help you refocus on what is truly important.  Your friends and family just spent months indulging in you.  Thank them. 

7. Host a post wedding brunch.  If your family and friends are local - you can always have a post wedding event.  I have heard some people host brunches, dinners, cook outs, camping trips... you name it.   Do something to celebrate your new family bond and spousal connection.  Have fun!

8.  Do This: Smile and enjoy the time you spent planning your wedding and sometimes it's ok to just put your wedding dress back on and pull a Monica Gellar :)  

Upstate NY Wedding Photographer: Grandma Flower Girls

I wish this was my idea. It wasn't.  However, when I saw this image on the Huffington Post I just about melted in a million ways. Grandma flower girls.

*Though not everyone will have grandparents alive and well at their wedding, it's a beautiful option if they are.  Grandmas as flower girls or even a dear friend or elderly aunt.  It's precious for so many reasons!!!
*They have lived life.  They probably have been married and have ages of wisdom in those precious wrinkles.
*They love you, so very much.  They have seen hard times and good times and have probably loved and lost love.
* They understand the sincerity of your wedding vows and when they smile at you it's years worth of knowledge reflecting in their eyes.
*For a moment, you have given them a chance to be youthful and fun as they toss pedals or simply walk toward you in this time you have allotted just for them.
It's not tradition, it's not possible for everyone.  It's just something that tugged at my heart and I thought....if only I had thought of that.

Punctuality: Yea, I’m Going To Go There

Disclaimer: Before you get all ruffled please read this  LIFE happens. Many reasons get in the way of getting to places and meetings on time. Babies puke, tires go flat and sometimes you just spill coffee on yourself on your way out the door.  Stuff happens…sometimes.

Punctuality.  It’s a word you love or hate. There are just some people you KNOW will show up when they say they will and will be where they say they will be.  There are also some people who claim "on time" is anywhere with a half hour to even an hour of the set time frame.

As stated in my disclaimer, I know things happen. I live life too. But here’s the clincher. There is something very personal and insulting about people who just can’t/refuse to mind their time and are perpetually late.

Let’s put it on me. If I tell a client I will meet them to discuss their wedding at 5 pm and I show up at 5:20. Do you know what that immediately tells my client? It tells them, they are not high on my priority list and my time is more valuable than theirs.  If I can’t be on time to a meeting, will I be on time for their wedding day?  It sets a terrible precedent right from the beginning.

The reverse is the same.  If a client is late, I feel that they disregard my time as a professional.  As much as I want EVERY client to feel special, each client is not my only.  Sometimes I have back to back appointments, sometimes I have a little one waiting at home for dinner, sometimes it’s just polite to be on time.

My very good friend ( who I will not name) told me that being perpetually late is a childish behavior (ouch!).  She says things more succinctly than I do.  I can’t disagree.  It does take planning to adhere to a schedule whether it be a dinner out with friends, a business meeting or just telling someone you will meet them for coffee. It says a lot about how you view their time and yours if you are always late.  You are quietly and every so firmly announcing that your time is more valuable and you don’t respect theirs.  

You may disagree. You may shake your head wildly. I never thought of being late as disrespectful either, until someone explained it the way I just explained to you.  But let’s face it, we all have clocks. If we hate roman numerals, we have lots of digital answers to that. Being on time is a choice. (most of the time).  A flat tire doesn’t happen every time you leave, a child doesn’t puke on you every time you walk out the door and if traffic is a problem, plan to leave early.  It’s thoughtful, it’s professional, it’s kind to just be on time. Punctuality = respect.   That is all.  :)

Should you separate your professional and personal twitter accounts?

To tweet or not to tweet...

Breakdown from my point of view is pretty simple. 

My age group and beyond (ahem 30 and over) mainly use twitter on business related platforms.  We don’t  lament about relationships or subtweet so our friends/enemies understand what we are saying.  We do create conversational content, but it’s usually directly related to business or it’s something personal that’s fun and lighthearted. We rarely decide to open our hearts and divulge the fact that our parents are ruining our lives on twitter.

20-something twitters...  You have gotten through your teenage years with nearly exclusive rights to twitter. No one else knew what the heck it was, much more know how to use it!  You could tell your ex-boyfriend to shove it in one tweet and cry over your college syllabus the next.

Many 20 somethings are becoming entrepreneurs and ready to take on the corporate world. This is where separating personal and social media may be necessary. 

 Let’s use photography for instance.  If I’m a potential client who has decided to follow you, a photographer, the last thing I want to see is a tweet about the fight you had with your parents or an *@!% to your last boyfriend, then two minutes later there is an update about the last wedding you photographed, I'm going to unfollow rather quickly.

Do yourself a favor. Separate. If you are in your 20’s and you still need to vent on social media or claim how much a song reminds you of someone, you may need to cut the ties a bit or move into the world of complete professionalism and provide a twitter handle that only your clients can see.  The 20 year old's are at odds with this problem because you have been tweeting now for longer than my business has been alive. You are the first generation that has to decide when it’s time to “mature” and go pro on social media. Good luck!

Teens: have a new challenge. Your twitter world has been infiltrated. The business world has figured out how twitter works. Applying for college and jobs just got a little more interesting. Where once you could express how much the despise your math teacher or hate your ex-boyfriend’s new best friends' girlfriend’s sister, you are now being held slightly more accountable.  The person holding the key to your future may decide to see how you handle yourself on social media. Is it fair? I don’t know, but it's reality.  The choice has to be made at 15 or 16 now that whatever you put out there, stays out there and for the first time in history- your angry tweets and lovey dovey romantically notions can be considered by employers. 

Just the humble opinion moi :).

Upstate NY Wedding Photographer: Are Rustic Barn Weddings Just A Trend?

Trends come and go and change faster than ever.  So is it possible the beautiful barns and rustic venues that are the hot spot of the wedding industry right now will eventually become abandoned ideas of weddings from the past?

Some of my couples who are getting married in these types of venues have said “well it’s certainly trending right now”.  Yes, it’s true, rustic, chic weddings are all current and key words in today’s wedding world, but I would say, it's not just a trend.

Heck no, Rustic Weddings Will Never Go:
 Rustic barn weddings are not a trend.  I think you will see various forms of wedding trends come and go for this style of wedding, but as a whole it shows no sign of dying out. Plug in rustic weddings on Pinterest and you will see for yourself, it's a community of creativity overload!

How do I know this?
Because I know everything. ;) Just kidding, but I do know that rustic wedding have a strong dominance in the wedding market right now and vendors are continuing to thrive, create and provide better service for couples looking for rustic style weddings.  I also find that many NYC couples are making the short trek upstate to savor making their forever promises in the rolling hills of the Catskills and Schoharie County.

Couples are too creative
Couples are just too creative to let a good thing die. Rustic venues certainly serve a creative person’s style and inclination to deviate from tradition.  Creativity is not an exclusive right to a country style wedding, but between the blogs and magazines dedicated to this genre of wedding ceremonies, it certainly promotes a sense of uniqueness and I think you will see it grow and change and get better and better.

It’s more than mason jar magic now kids:

This past year I have seen many crazy cool twists and turns to the wedding industry in the rustic sense.  Mason jars were the early poster child for all things unique in the country wedding, but it’s become way more than that.
I encourage you to follow along on Pinterest as we post images from our rustic weddings and find some ideas of our own.
Check out a few of my boards as we continue to build on ideas - we always welcome to hear some of yours!  Amber J Weddings on Pinterest


Stay tuned for our next blog features Maple Shade Farms in Upstate NY. They have actually found a way to make a DIY wedding happen for you! I think it's a fantastic idea and I can't wait to share it with you!